And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Randomize
