Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize
