I don't think brook has ever known best
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize