We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Randomize