I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
