My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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