I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
