He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize