I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Randomize
