We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
