return my video game
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
