What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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