Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
