this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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