do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
