I want to make a zoo with you.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
