WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
