how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
