I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
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