I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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