Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
