OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
