We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I look better un-naked...
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
