And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
