I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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