What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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