3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
