Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
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