it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
