I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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