That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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