my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize