I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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