Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Randomize