i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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