5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
