Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
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