she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Randomize
