I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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