is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize