what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
