you guys were way drunker than both of me
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
