if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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