well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
