that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
