i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
