i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
