I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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