so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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