So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Randomize
